A man with a heavy drinking habit received a warning from his wife.

A man who drank a lot was warned by his wife, “If you ever come home drunk again, I’m leaving you.”

But that night, he still went to the pub, had too much to drink, and ended up getting sick on his shirt.

Worried, he told his friend, “If I go home like this, my wife will leave me.” His friend suggested, “Put a twenty-pound note in your jacket pocket. When you get home, tell her someone else got sick on you and gave you the money for cleaning.”

He went home, and his wife immediately got upset, saying she was done with him. He quickly explained, “No, no, someone else got sick on me and gave me twenty pounds for the cleaning!”

His wife looked in his pocket and pulled out two twenty-pound notes. Confused, she asked, “Then why do you have two?”

“Oh,” he replied, “the other one is from the man who had… another kind of accident in my pants.”