“WOMAN PULLED OVER BY… “

A little old lady was strolling down the street, dragging two hefty plastic garbage bags behind her. As she walked, one of the bags snagged on a curb and ripped open, sending a flurry of $20 bills fluttering out onto the sidewalk.

A passing policeman noticed the scene and stopped her, saying, “Ma’am, you’re losing money! There are $20 bills falling out of that bag!”

“Oh dear! Is that so?” exclaimed the old lady, looking genuinely surprised. “I better go back and collect them. Thank you for letting me know, officer!”

“Not so fast,” said the cop, eyeing her suspiciously. “Where did all that money come from? You didn’t steal it, did you?”

“Oh, heavens no!” she replied, shaking her head. “You see, my backyard is right next to the parking lot of the football stadium. On game days, fans have a habit of relieving themselves through a knot hole in the fence, right into my flower garden. It used to make me furious, killing my flowers and ruining my hard work. But then I thought, ‘Why not turn this into a money-making opportunity?’”

The policeman raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “Go on…”

“Well,” she continued with a twinkle in her eye, “on game days, I quietly stand by that knot hole with my hedge clippers. As soon as some guy sticks his pecker through the fence, I jump out and say, ‘Alright, buddy! That’ll be $20, or off it comes!’”

The cop burst out laughing. “That’s one way to handle it! Seems fair enough. Best of luck, ma’am! By the way, what’s in the other bag?”

“Oh, you know,” she said, a sly grin spreading across her face, “not everyone pays up!”